UN(comfort)ABLE

It’s no secret- human life is uncomfortable- it’s guaranteed. I’m not a pessimist, while I can be I’d like to say I‘m more of a realist. However, I make this claim with certainty in the bible it says “For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” Jeremiah 29:11 

I assume that many people know of this bible verse. I am not a theologist, but I felt the need to share this verse yet again; after it guarantees all the promises of God, and his purpose in our lives- to give US- yes us sinners a future. This verse has offered and still offers hope to many Christians around the world, and I hope that in times of trouble you will find peace in these words.

This uncomfortable feeling originates back to the Garden of Eden. If you remember from Sunday School (don‘t worry if you didn‘t go to Sunday School I’ll fill you in). Adam and Eve the first human creations made from the hand of God, the Creator himself brought this suffering upon themselves. That moment their teeth bit into that apple from the Tree of Knowledge the fate of mankind became established- boom. 

This is where original sin entered our world. You might think “Why did God allow this to happen?” my friend this is where another one of God’s many gifts come into play- free will. We as humans can decide how we act, what we say, what we do for ourselves. What a blessing my friend rejoice in this! Does He want us to sin? No, I imagine not. Does He find pleasure in your suffering? The short answer is no, I don’t think he gets joy out of seeing our pain here on Earth. Do not fear my friend for He has given us this to cling to:

“There is a time for everything,
    and a season for every activity under the heavens:
a time to be born and a time to die,
a time to plant and a time to uproot,
a time to kill and a time to heal,
a time to tear down and a time to build,
a time to weep and a time to laugh,
a time to mourn and a time to dance,
a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them,
a time to embrace and a time to refrain from embracing,
a time to search and a time to give up,
a time to keep and a time to throw away,
a time to tear and a time to mend,
a time to be silent and a time to speak,
a time to love and a time to hate,
a time for war and a time for peace.” Ecclesiastes 3:1-9. 

I’m not sure of the popularity of these verses, but popularity doesn‘t matter. I first read this after my great—grandfather passed away. No, it was not in a freak accident, he lived to the old age of 90 despite suffering from vascular dementia in his later years. He outlived his 17 brothers/sisters/cousins (yeah you read correct- after all his family had been poor sharecroppers, and after his dad died, his mom married her brother-in-law). He also outlived two wives and a female companion, all of his kids, grandkids, and great grandkids. What a blessing! During his later years, he grew in his faith alongside his daughter (my grandmother) who was his primary caregiver. 

This gave me an unreal peace when my great-grandfather passed away. I highly suggest reading the whole chapter. I want to look deeper into Ecclesiastes after my reading. Further on it goes to restate that God is not a vengeful God. I am working towards reading the word of God more. In time I hope that most of my blog post will take root in biblical findings and faith. However, I want to proceed with caution. I don‘t want to seem like I know the answers- this is just a college girl’s own interpretation of the Bible (alongside consulting other resources for historical reference). 

I think I made my point about how being uncomfortable is a part, a side effect of living. I am no stranger to this feeling; however, as I’m growing older and with the word of God, I feel this strange feeling less. Still now managing my relationship with uncomfortableness- I wouldn‘t change what I’ve been through for the world. My younger self? Oh, it would have delighted her to not know the feeling of her face flushing red when called upon or afraid to speak up.

Hear me out I still face my battles with the uncomfortable things of life, but now I am more at ease and confident in my abilities. These feeling still come creeping up truthfully I don’t think that will ever change, but I have made self-improvement and that for me means the world. 
Before I tell you, what’s worked for me, I want to say something. I have anxiety along with other mental health and health issues. I am on anxiety medicine, and soon will be in therapy. I also have had a solid support system for most of my journey in life. I do not want to say this will “fix” you, or it will help you as it’s helped me. However, by doing these things I experience less uncomfortable feelings throughout my day. For example, walking on campus by myself used to be something I dreaded no matter the time of day, or what was going on. I still don’t like it, but I’ve gotten better. Oh, and these products are all not sponsored (just kidding). I believe in them for myself at least and bought most with my money (if you’re in college you get it). 

 Uninvited: Living Loved When You Feel Less Than, Left Out, and Lonely by Lysa TerKeurst

I am still reading this book, however; I feel the need to share this with everyone! I’ve since purchased her newest book and a study guide for the book of Proverbs. Yes, this is a Christian book, but it is so much more than that. Lysa comes from a place where her readers can digest information easy, and without too much of that sting, we can feel when we’ve drifted from God. I also appreciate that while she is an “older woman” you’d never know without reading the book or looking her up. We often talk wisdom about in the church, and I believe when engaged with Christians further along in their walk in faith that younger generations can learn and apply this new perspective. 

A good meditation app (I prefer headspace)

Yes, notice I said “a good meditation app”. This is where I will ask you to put trust in me. I know that meditation might not work for everyone the same way it does for me. Believe me when I say finding a meditation app that works for you can do wonders. I know that meditation might not work for everyone the same way it does for me. During one point in my life, I never could imagine being able to meditate and relax. 

Let me guess. When I used the word meditation, I bet stereotypes filled your head. I’m asking you try to push all of these preconceived notions to the side. There are many online resources that are free, and others that don’t break the bank. When choosing an app/program it is important to consider not only what makes you comfortable, but what motivates you to continue. For me I enjoy guided meditation, I also know I need extrinsic motivation to continue to meditate. For me, the headspace app fulfills this need. It also offers beginners courses to meditation for free! 

Last, meaningfully spending time in my daily walk with God. Below are some of my favorite resources!

https://thebibleproject.com/
https://first5.org/
https://www.BibleGateway.com/

I hope this post finds you well where ever you may be in life. 

Grace Bibus 1/26/19

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